A Blog is Born

Okay, Stacy, you talked me into it ...... here goes:

Due in part to my extensive (and somewhat infamous; I kid you not) technological ignorance, my need to stay connected with friends, and the desire to, despite my best efforts at suppression and neglect for 5 years, unleash again the inner beast I refer to as "the journaling diva," I am starting this blog today. (Drum roll, please.) Restrospectively, back in the day when a blank page and and hour in a quiet room were enough to excite my innermost geek, writing was a reflection of my thoughts, feelings, prayers (etc., blah, blah...you get the point.) I was in college, grieving, studying, working, struggling with His calling-fearless on the outside, secretly scared but trusting God anyway. I threw myself at the foot of His throne, grabbed hold, and refused to let go. (Never let it be said that southern women are nothing if not tenacious.) My journals became an outpouring of a young heart that was searching for answers to tough questions about her place and her faith. It was, at its most basic level, the only tangible connection I had to my "journey of becoming" (so to speak). Even though, through circumstances beyond my control, I no longer have those words physically in my possession and have long since forgotten most of what I'd written, I realize how important they were both then and now. Then because of the healing and spiritual growth they afforded me; I've never been as close to God; now because they have so strongly shaped the decisions that led to what I do and who I am.

And so, all of that emotional revelation (I'm not sure where all of that came from, but I'm told bloggers are somewhat forgiving of tangential ramblings.) to say this: In recent weeks, through certain eye-opening circumstances, discussions with godly counsel (you know who you are), and quiet times of listening to that still, small (but yet so powerful!) voice, I have decided that (1) Although I have been trained in the tradition of science steeped in evidence-based practices and physical proof, at my core I am still moved, no, molded, by the more artistic process that translates thoughts into words and then onto paper (or, begrudingly, onto computer screens). There, I've admitted it.... (2) This world (with just a little help from ourself) makes it easy to forget (or ignore) what we are called to do (Micah 6:8); It's amazing how smart some people (self included) are and still so easily deceived about what is right. We're so willing to be lulled in a bed of self-absorption and instant gratification. How dangerous is that? Hmphh....excuse me while I extract the slingshot stone that just hit me between the eyes. I've prayed for forgiveness of my complacency and impatience, to have the resolve of Paul and the endurance of Jeremiah.....
Some time ago I found this verse: "This is what the Lord says: Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls...." [Jeremiah 6:16]

I could never hope (or dare) to re-create what I've lost or re-live a season in my life that has past; I wouldn't want to do that anyway. But I can, and I will, stand at this time in my life, at this "crossroads," and instead of blindly rushing forward and dreading every moment-counting it as a burden or task to be completed-I will, God willing, learn to wait on Him, and choose to walk the faithful way. That's really what it's all about, isn't it? When I sat down to write this, I had no idea what I wanted to say...this is just what's been on my mind lately. I'm coming back AND going forward: BACK to writing and pontificating and what I know God uses in my life to bring me closer to Him (despite the Faulkenerian sentences, comma splices, and horrific grammar that would make any English professor weep with only a 12-pack of red pens for solace); FORWARD to whatever and wherever He leads.........until next time, I'm praying I'll be livin' the life.

This, by the way, is all Stacy's fault for being such a powerful witness. :)